Sunday, February 28, 2010

brand new day.

This week has been ridiculously stressful, to say the least. As I mentioned in a previous entry, things had been going too well so things were bound to get a little screwy eventually, right? :) Between classes, tests, a MAJOR paper (that I have legitimately been working on for a week and am still nowhere near done), CalTV, work, Apartment Association, friend drama, and more, it's a lot to handle! I've been trying really hard to maintain control over my insecurities and feelings, but it's so hard sometimes. That's two thing that you totally lose when you leave for college, people who will tolerate you when you're emotional and a space in which you can be emotional. As lame as it sounds, it's really hard not having a space that is totally my own in which I can cry, laugh, sing, talk, yell or sleep without anyone watching. This total lack of privacy is completely unnerving at times, and it's only now that I realize that I've taken it for granted my whole life. I can't wait to have my own room next year, and regain that little bit of sanity that comes along with having my own space.

Throughout all the things that have happened this week, of which I don't care to elaborate because a) it'll only upset me more b) it'll upset the other people involved and c) the specifics aren't really important, it's become ridiculously apparent that I have amazing friends. Whether it be my best friend in Los Angeles, my friends up here or my boy back home, everyone has been so understanding and calming and I don't think that I would have retained my calm without their help. I'd also like to make a special shout-out to my mother who has been nothing short of amazing these past few days as I've slowly begun my descent into the madness that is stress.

Things are good, life is amazing. It's easy to get caught up in the moment and get upset over meaningless things but I have to stop myself and just remember that I am exactly where I want to be, with the most amazing people around me and in my life, and although things could be better, it's these moments that exist so that we can truly value the good things life has to offer.


  1. agh I miss you come home!!!!!

  2. I MISS YOU TOO why aren't we in the same city?! :(

  3. Living with people is difficult, to say the least. Totally understand what you're talking about. And I definitely DON'T miss sharing a room year-round with someone else.